Top 12 expat comebacks to say to someone if they ask: Are you pregnant?

Posted on July 24 by Jennifer Avventura

I’m part of an élite group. It’s a place where I hang-out and shout my beefs and joys about living in Italy. It’s also a place where I’ve virtually met, and been inspired by expats who have, or are living in Italy.

This wonderful group has helped me see the ways of a country which has been in turmoil since Fred Flintstone helped build Bedrock. The name of this fabulous group is:

Italian Reflections – The social group for expats’ reflections of life here in Italy…

Today I posted a question, or rather a statement about what has happened to me since I moved here in 2008:

Within the span of two days the following verbal garbage spilled from the mouths of locals:

You’re skinny, you can squeeze between the two cars.
When I look at you by your profile you look pregnant. Are you pregnant?

This happens often, too frequent for my liking so I took to my super élite group of expats in Italy to see if this is happening elsewhere. And guess what? It is!

Shocking I know, and sad at the same time.

We brainstormed until the rain came (well, on the mainland anyway, here in Sardinia it seems to only thunder, without the rain) and this is what we’ve come up with:

Top 12 expat comebacks to say to someone if they ask: Are you pregnant?

No, I had a wrestling match with a spoon and a 1kg jar of Nutella and the Nutella won.
No, we went for pizza last night. I ate mine, then I ate my husbands.
No, I haven’t pooed in four days. Where’s the pharmacy?
No, I cannot imagine anything worse than being pregnant … where can I buy a bottle of Prosecco?
Maybe, but I don’t know who the father is …
Maybe, but please don’t tell my husband, he’d be terribly upset.
Maybe, but I can’t stop smoking these lovely Italian cigarettes.
OH! I hope not! We are using three different types of birth control …
Yes, it’s twins.
Yes, but it’s not mine.
Ah yes, it’s terrible isn’t it, my stomach bloats after I eat because I have irritable bowel syndrome.
Yes, is it legal to have an abortion in Italy?

I’d like to thank the wonderful expats from Italian Reflections who put a smile on my face … daily.

Are you an expat? Do the locals ever say anything of the like to you?

Sardinia – A stunning paradise of litter

Posted on July 22 by Jennifer Avventura

“Be the change you wish to see in the world.” – Gandhi

Nothing annoys me more than seeing a beautiful beach, street or park littered with the laziness of people who continue to make our world a not so beautiful place to live. My favourite time to hit the beach in Sardinia is May and September – why you ask? Well, because there are hardly any tourists and the beaches are clean. What you say? Clean? Yes, clean and litter free.

Jennifer Avventura My Sardinian Life 2013 (3)

Who do you think is going to walk down that long sandy path to clean this disgusting mess up? The commune? The men and women who work long, hard hours collecting garbage from house to house, from shop to shop and from hotel to hotel? You really think they are paid adequately to walk down that steep incline to retrieve the garbage you left? NO! No, they aren’t and no they won’t.

Now, I can’t put all this litter blame on the tourists, can I? That would be totally ignorant on my part. This is a local problem as much as it’s an international problem. I’ve given harsh words to my local friends about leaving their cigarette butts in the sand, and I’ve been tempted one too many times to give the same harsh words to the tourists I see leaving litter on the beach (but lucky for you, my husband held me back).

If you brought it with you – take it away with you, this includes your cigarette butts! There are adequate garbage bins at ALL public beaches in Sardinia.

Don’t be an uneducated fool who leaves litter on this island, or anywhere in this beautiful place we call planet earth.

Considered yourself warned. I’ll be watching you.

Related articles:

Sardegna, paradiso dei rifiuti
Maleducati al Poetto: Giro di vite su rifiuti, cicche e parcheggi sulla spiaggia
Rifiuti e disagi, spiagge da salvare
Sinis, rifiuti sulla spiaggia di S.Giovanni Turisti delusi si improvvisano netturbini

Weekly Photo Challenge: Fresh

Gallery

Posted on July 20 by Jennifer Avventura

This gallery contains 4 photos.

“She’s fresh, exciting. She’s so exciting to me. She’s fresh, exciting. She’s so inviting to me, yeah.” – Kool & The Gang Fresh bird-prints on an early morning beach run. Some of my favourite fresh vegetables from the farmers market. … Continue reading →

Travel Theme: Tilted in Jamaica

Gallery

Posted on July 20 by Jennifer Avventura

This gallery contains 4 photos.

We spent two rainy weeks touring most of Jamaica, and here are a few tilted photos from those wet days. Want to see more tilted photos from around the world? Head on over to Ailsa’s blog Where’s my backpack for … Continue reading →

Weekly Photo Challenge: The Golden Hour #2

Posted on July 16 by Jennifer Avventura

I dusted off an old flash drive and was surprised to find burning golden hour photos. I was shocked at how beautiful some of them are and even more shocked to find out that I snapped these shots in 2010. So, without further ado, here is my second installment into the weekly photo challenge.

Asinara Bay, Sardinia, Italy

The Golden Hour by Jennifer Avventura

The Golden Hour By Jennifer Avventura My Sardinian Life 2013 (3) I snapped the following photo through our dirty living-room window. It has not been altered in any way. Looks like the end of the world to me.

The Golden Hour By Jennifer Avventura My Sardinian Life 2013 (4)

A golden hour sunset in HDR.

The Golden Hour By Jennifer Avventura My Sardinian Life 2013 (5)

To see more fabulous shots from around the world which depict the golden hour then please click here.

Travel Theme: Simplicity Sardinia

Posted on July 14 by Jennifer Avventura

La Marinedda, Sardinia, Italy

This is my response to Ailsa’s weekly travel theme: Simplicity

Weekly Photo Challenge: The Golden Hour

Posted on July 13 by Jennifer Avventura

This week the folks controlling the Weekly Photo Challenge have asked us to represent “The Golden Hour.” The golden hour is the first and last hour of the day. I’ve never been a sunset photographer and sunrises are just too early for me. I did however manage to capture a photo of the setting full moon one early morning.

The Golden Hour – Asinara Bay, Sardinia, Italy

This photo was shot at 5:03 am using a Sony Cyber-Shot. I think it turned out pretty cool, you can even see the moon’s reflection, shining brightly on Castlesardo. There is nothing golden about this photo but it was shot at the right time for this weeks theme.

Any tips for capturing the perfect golden hour of a sunset?

When paradise turns deadly – Sardinia’s Somber Secret

Posted on July 13 by Jennifer Avventura

Surprise washed over him as he found himself lying on the hard tiled floor of a pharmacy in a small fishing village on the coast of northwest Sardinia, Italy. “What am I doing here?” he thought as people curiously gathered around him. Continue reading →

Complete Event Guide to Summer in Sardinia 2013

Posted on July 11 by Jennifer Avventura

Here it is folks – the who, what, where and when of summer 2013 in Sardinia, Italy. Concerts, culture, food festivals, jazz festivals, cinema and much, much more! For the first time in five and a half years, I have seen something that gets me so excited that I want to do cartwheels, back-flips and scream from the top of Gennargentu. Never in the almost 6 years that I have lived in Sardinia have I seen something so organized, articulate and thorough! I would like to personally thank the ingenious people at SardegnaEventi24.it for putting together such an elaborate and informative map listing all events in Sardinia for summer 2013.

Now you can have your very own event map! Complete with listings for every town and city in Sardinia. Print it, save it, carry it in your back pocket but whatever you do, be sure to download it – it’s super FREE.

To download your FREE event guide for Sardinia Summer 2013 please visit this link: Il Foglio di Sardegna Eventi; tell them I sent you!

So many wonderful events and so little time. Which event(s) will you be going to?

A nostalgic panorama from a Sardinian Snowfall

Posted on July 6 by Jennifer Avventura

Snow makes me feel nostalgic. Freshly fallen snow atop Sardinian mountains and valleys gives me feelings of revitalization and reminds me of cold Canadian winters past. I’ve always hated the cold, the deep, long Canadian winters and everything associated with it: wearing a toque, mittens, boots, wet socks, scarves, skiing, shoveling, de-icing the car, plugging the car battery in over night and the dirty wet slush that always comes with a heavy snowstorm.

That is why I’ve spent most of my life living or vacationing in tropical paradises all over the world (Mexico, Cuba, Dominican Republic, Australia, Jamaica, Cayman Islands). When I decided to move to Sardinia I convinced myself that it didn’t snow – it couldn’t, could it?

It did snow, for three lovely weeks.

And for the snow-bird who always flew the coop when it got too cold; I found myself diving head first into the stunning Sardinian snowfall that had bestowed its beautiful white grace upon the lush green mountain tops of Sardinia.