31 Days as a Beach Bar Waitress – Sardinia, Italy

Jennifer Avventura My Sardinian Life Expat WaitressThe long hot hours of work are finally over and I’m looking forward to catching up on lost sleep. Everyday I worked 12pm – 9pm without a day off, as that’s how the cookie crumbles in Sardinia. At times, it was difficult to keep the smile on my face and more often than not I wanted to sucker punch a few guests in the face for stupid remarks. Overall, it was a beautiful whirlwind working at the lovely beach bar Mistral Bar at La Marinedda beach. I met some fantastic people who quickly became friends and I saw 31 stunning sunsets worthy of a painted picture.

Here is a little list of what I endured in the 31 days as a Beach Bar Waitress

  • “Do you live here?” Me: No, I fly in from Canada every morning. Ryanair now offers a direct flight from Alghero to Niagara Falls.
  • “Where are you from?” Me: You have to guess. Guest: Finland, Denmark, Australia, South Africa, England, Bulgaria, Holland, Ireland, Scotland, America … (they never, ever guess Canada).
  • “Why are you here?” Me: I hit the love jackpot.
  • “Wow, what sport do you do? You’re very fit.” Me: I serve drinks all day to idiots like you.
  • “Where are you from?” Me: I’m from Canada. Guest: Oh, you sound American.
  • “Excuse me? But why is the beach half of what it was last year? Did the sea eat the beach?” Me: (mouth hanging open) Uh, yeah, the sea was very hungry this year.
  • A woman walks into a beach bar full of guests eating lunch. She stands naked but for the small g-string attached to her curvy hips and she just stands there… her fake mountainous cleavage obscuring the view of the diners.
  • Three men from Napoli sit down and ask for three beers. When they have finished the first round I ask if they’d like a second and this is the response “well, we can’t eat the bottles now can we?” I quickly retreated behind the bar and popped open three fresh beers and brought them to the table when I’m greeted with “Ma che cazzo – chi ha ordinato questo? What the fuck – who ordered this?”
  • Two couples come in to eat and drink on the busiest day of the month – the Frozen Open Surf contest. They are polite, happy and after three hours one of the men ask for the check. When I deliver the check to the person who asked I am greeted with anger and really, really bad swear words from the other man. He told me that I should have given the check to him, and I’m an idiot for not knowing that. I told him “I’m sorry sir, but I can’t read the minds of raging lunatics.”
  • My Mizuno running shoes kept a lot of the customers talking for 31 days.Jennifer Avventura My Sardinian Life (9) A four-year old girl said “Your shoes are ugly. They are not beach shoes.” People would obviously stare at my running shoes and make all sorts of comments. I had an argument with a marathoner (N.B. never get into a conversation about running with a multiple time marathoner … it will never end) about me being lazy and not training for a marathon even though I told him I have zero interest in running marathons.
  • I cleaned up enough pee on the bar floor to last me a lifetime. Parents … I know it’s a beach but please put a diaper on it when entering a bar.
  • I learned that if you do your job efficiently that Italians do know how to tip.
  • I saw 31 stunning Sardinian sunsets, surfers and a popular Italian minister.

For this year it’s over, and it seems so is summer; I watch a storm roll in over the mountains of the Gallura and rest my weary waitress head to the table and dream of Mom’s chicken noodle soup.

What did you do that’s spectacular this summer?

About Jennifer Avventura

Canadian Freelance writer living in Sardinia, Italy. A serial expat who lived in Australia, England and Cayman Islands. She eats Nutella with a spoon and hides under the bed during lightning storms. When she's not out running 6k you will find her sitting at the computer - writing her novel and searching for worldwide waitress work.
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44 Responses to 31 Days as a Beach Bar Waitress – Sardinia, Italy

  1. aj vosse says:

    Some mother’s children!! At least someone paid you a semi-compliment by suggesting you were South African… ;-)

    • The worst of it was when I said I’m Canadian and they said “oh you sound American.” Not that I have anything against my southern meighbours, nothing at all. It’s just ignorance on the part of the tourist!

    • The worst of it was when I said I’m Canadian and they said “oh you sound American.” Not that I have anything against my southern neighbours, nothing at all. It’s just ignorance on the part of the tourist!

  2. Janice says:

    Good post. People can be so ugly when on vacation, expecting service like a maid…surprised it wasnt worse though as have heard the stories re the villasimius area, i am from a tourist area in the states and its the same there…if they are seasoned travelers they behave much better! There are such things as good manners and kindness! Anyway good you made some friends at the bar, here good friends usually become precious part of life in italy.

  3. joesard says:

    LOL being a “Hooked” Hook fan I can see that you also have acquired a caustic perspective of humanity on vacation…by the way perhaps you could find some time to expand that intriguing episode involving a g-string and silicon …details are needed ;-) Have a nice day , get some rest and take advantage of Sardinia’s September IMO the best period of the year :-)

  4. ggnitaly84 says:

    HA the g-string lady had me cracking up. I mean seriously?! Brava to you Jennifer for sticking it out – that is no easy job, that’s for sure!

  5. Yup! we only tip when the service is impeccable… congratulazioni! :^)

    Yeah, parents pee all around! ;^D
    Yesterday we went to a bar and a friend’s dog puked on the floor… lol, it was awkward and hilarious at the same time.

    “Secondo giro di birra”… you are Sardo-Canadian, most Italians are not used to that!

  6. Working with the public is always such fun! At least you’re in Italy! Priceless!

  7. Keren says:

    Hats off to you to for putting up with the “maleducati” :-)

  8. Al says:

    I have two words for the men who cussed at you for not knowing who gets the check…..justifiable homicide!

  9. Paul Corda says:

    As for the last remark…was it Berlusconi????

  10. joesard says:

    @Pietro Branca (@georgatoss) following up Sardo-Canadian …..and when ,from time to time, she’s flying around the globe she’ also a Canadair :-)

  11. chirose says:

    I loved this post..!! It was fantastic.! As an American who lived and worked in the hotel industry in Mexico, I can completely relate to some of your experiences. It’s nice to know someone else who was in similar trenches :)

  12. adinparadise says:

    You really made me smile, Jennifer. I guess it all goes with the territory. Glad the tips were good. Sounds like you deserved some decent compensation. :)

  13. Hahaha…love the August casino!!

  14. Chris says:

    I’m sure your mother greatly misses making you chicken soup!

  15. kathexpat says:

    Jennifer, how you deal with these people is amazing. I would have stayed behind the bar in the fetal position, possibly crying.

  16. Nicki says:

    Love it! I am working the Positano version: yes I do parlay ing lay sey, no, Amalfi is not an island, no you can’t get a boat to Ravello it’s at the top of a mountain, yes I live here, yes I can speak Italian, no you can’t rent that canoe it’s mine and YES I am white, I have been sitting under an umbrella all summer working.

  17. colonialist says:

    Stupid questions in Sardinia Can-aid-in making you Sardonic! :)

  18. Too funny Jennifer – I love #1. Now that would be a commute!:) Those of us who live on the coast and have worked summer beach jobs sure have some stories to tell. ~Terri

  19. Pingback: 4 fabulous blogs I love right now | My Sardinian Life

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